top of page
Search

Meet Claire: Parenting, Perseverance & Finding Light in the Hard Seasons 💜

As we continue Neurodiversity Celebration Week 2026, we’re honoured to share the voice of Claire McMillan - a parent whose courage, honesty and determination reflect the lived experiences of so many families across Ayrshire.


Claire is the mum of two neurodivergent boys, aged 15 and 11. Her journey hasn’t been simple or straightforward. It has involved long waiting lists, private assessments, sleepless nights, confusion, advocacy, small victories and deep love.


But above all, Claire wants other parents to know this:

“You’re not alone.”

Her story is a powerful reminder that behind every child’s profile is a family navigating real‑world challenges - and behind every challenge, there are strengths, insights and moments of unexpected beauty.


Claire’s Story 💜


Claire describes her two sons as wonderfully different - each with unique strengths, traits and needs.


Her eldest, who has ADHD, thrives in many ways: his attention to detail, his passion, his ability to focus intensely on what interests him.


Her youngest, who is autistic and has OCD, has a refreshing honesty and sees the world in a way that challenges and inspires.


But their journey hasn’t been without barriers. Like many families, Claire faced lengthy waits for assessment and support. Both boys are under CAMHS, and both required private diagnosis and therapy to get the help they needed. This has been a long journey - beginning in nursery and continuing into adolescence.


Claire speaks openly about the different “seasons” her sons move through - from sensory overwhelm and routine changes to hormonal shifts, sleep differences and social challenges.

Each season requires new understanding, new strategies and new patience.

And yet, even in the hardest moments, she finds joy in their outlooks:

“His outlook on life is so refreshing. He’s not tied down by social norms… he just says what he thinks.”

These moments remind her - and us - that neurodivergence brings depth, honesty and perspectives that many adults lose along the way.


The Loneliness Many Parents Don’t Talk About 💜


One of the most powerful parts of Claire’s story is her reflection on isolation.


She shares how misunderstanding and stigma can ripple through school playgrounds, friendship groups and parent communities.


Judgements about behaviour - without understanding the “why” - can leave families feeling alone, unwelcome or “ostracised.”


Her son has been invited to only two birthday parties in his entire school journey. She doesn’t have a group of parents to meet for coffee, compare notes with or laugh with on difficult days.


“It can be quite lonely not having people who understand.”

This reality is why NEST - and community voices like Claire’s - matter so deeply. When stories are shared, stigma breaks. When people learn, compassion grows.


Hope, Support and Learning 💜


Claire credits supportive professionals, a positive headteacher, and NEST workshops as key parts of understanding her children more fully.


Learning about sensory differences, diet, anxiety, and routines helped her feel equipped and empowered at home.


Her message to others in similar situations is simple and heartfelt:


“If you’re in the trenches right now, I really do sympathise… each season brings something new and something amazing in our kids. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel.”

🎥 Watch the Video

Hear Claire’s story in her own words.

This short film captures her warmth, honesty and the real lived experiences behind the challenges many families face every day.



📢 A Note on Personal Stories

This story is shared in Claire’s own words, reflecting her personal experiences as a parent. It has not been written or shaped by NEST or NHS Ayrshire & Arran. We’re simply supporting her to share her voice as part of Neurodiversity Celebration Week.



📝 Full Video Transcript

To read the full video transcript you can either download it below or read it below.



Meet Claire – Neurodiversity Celebration Week 2026 – Full Video Transcript

My name's Claire McMillan and I have two sons who are neurodivergent.

I have an older son who's 15 and he has ADHD and my youngest son is 11 and he has autism and OCD.

I wanted to show other parents that they're not alone, that there are other parents out there that are going through similar challenges and similar sort of life and that there's a chance that we could all connect and have someone, seeing someone else that's going through it sometimes makes it just that wee bit easier when you're having a hard day.

So, both my sons present really differently. We both have different challenges and different amazing characteristics and attributes. For us as a family, our youngest son has definitely been the most challenging for us in getting the help and support that he needed. have been with CAMHS and on their list and we ended up actually going privately for assessments and support. We also have a private psycho-therapist that we use with him as well. We've kind of followed that sort of pathway with him and we're still using those private services at the moment. And that has been since sort of nursery age, right, through to where we are just now.

With an older son, he's again, he's with CAMHS as well, on their list. We, again, have been for a private diagnosis with him as well. And his support needs are within a mainstream setting as well. And I think that I found his less challenging. I don't know, perhaps, maybe the similarities that I found in myself. and he's easier to support in different seasons that he goes through. I seem to weather them better and I find the more challenging is that his mum is from a younger son in the season that he goes through that I find more challenging.

 

her youngest son, an aspect of his challenges that we've had to overcome, things like his routines, things to trigger them, and understanding the way his brain works. I think that things like a change of routine should change our whole day, could prevent a family outing from happening when he's especially a little bit younger. It's a different sort of season for us now, for the challenges being sort of hormonal challenges. So things that they have to be able to overcome quite quickly is that thing that would then now trigger them and we could have that for days on end. The challenges with sleep, different dietary requirements and I think I think for him, if you were to ask him what his biggest challenges are, it would be social and connecting with his peers.

With my elder son, I think his challenge is probably more so that he's fully back and I'll maybe have to ask him to do his daily routine in the morning about a million times. I could do it every single day and every single day I would just do the same thing and that's what he really struggles with.

 

at my youngest son, his outlook on life, his black and white thought process. the fact that he doesn't, he's not tied down with constraints to social norms. And it's very, I remember when he was younger, I did get a bit embarrassed, but now it's more so, and actually it's so refreshing, his outlook on things, or maybe some things, examples that we're looking at things like mortality, and his outlook on that is But when you're upset, is that not just love that you're feeling? Which was, and things like that. I think his outlook on things like that just a refreshing thing for as an adult to see and him not worried about what anybody else thinks. He just says what he thinks and that's it.

 

With my oldest son, his process of like looking at something and really into it, his attention to detail is unreal and I think I'm like how come you could be so good with that like it's just he's fantastic. He's got his mind on something and the amount he can get done and that time is on and inspired by him.

 

When you see things like at the school gates and the mum and son will be standing all talk and I felt personally I was quite ostracised in the sense that if your child has done things in the school it kind of comes back to other parents and it can be misconstrued as aggressiveness or bit inappropriate and obviously these things go back. So other parents tend to not want to speak to you because your son's maybe done something that they don't agree with because if they don't know why he's done it, I found it very difficult to make friends and other parents.

I don't have a parents group that I can go out for drinks with or lunches or meet up and have play dates. Henry James' whole time at school has been Twice he's been invited to birthday parties and every other time he's never invited to them. And that's very hard, I think, as a mum not having...

 

so I tend to pull myself back and it can be quite lonely not having people who understand and people that I can go out and be an adult with and be like oh what's your son doing and aw mine's has done this and if I was to say something oh he's not going to eat those sausages that I bought 5 million of because that was things it really loved and now he hates them like they'd be like we'll just feed him something else that sort of not understanding and it's not people's fault. I think that the more people are educated that would maybe make a difference.

 

The head teacher that we have currently within our primary school has been fantastic. He really, really refreshed things for Those for us have been. I've been to lots of NEST workshops as well and I think that I didn't know I learned in them and I was like oh I don't understand why that's happening type thing. So for us those workshops I'd definitely advise to go to them because it's not just things from autism but just things from like the dietary things that I didn't realise. I found out lots from them and managed to use them and implement them at home.

 

That if there is a neurodivergent child in your kid's class, getting information and learning about their differences and the things that they excel in and teaching your children maybe to be kind and also if there's that mum standing there on her own just say hello and it could be that she's been up for all night and had two hours sleep and her primary seven child hasn't been eating or has been up all night worried about he's no friends or whatever else just be kind take a moment just to be nice and reach a hand out because I think that would make a massive difference for a lot of people. alone or that that maybe people didn't realise that there were people like myself standing in their playgrounds, that if you're fighting for something that it is worth it for the support they get, that when they get the right support it can change their life and it's night and day.

 

I've been in the trenches and it's so, so hard and if you're in them just now I do really sympathise. I know how hard it is in each season bring something new and something really amazing in our kids and that there's always a light at the end of the tunnel.

 

 

Comments

bottom of page