Building Routines That Actually Work 🔁

Routines can be powerful tools for reducing stress and creating a sense of stability.

But for many neurodivergent adults - and for parents and carers supporting neurodivergent children - traditional routines can feel rigid, overwhelming, and hard to maintain.

So, how do we build routines that truly work for our brains and lives?

Why Rigid Routines Can Feel Overwhelming

Strict schedules often assume that every day looks the same.

For neurodivergent minds, energy levels, sensory needs, and executive function can vary from day to day.

When routines are too rigid, they can create pressure instead of comfort - and lead to feelings of failure when life doesn’t fit the plan.

The Benefits of Predictability

Predictability matters.

It helps reduce anxiety and makes transitions easier.

But predictability doesn’t have to mean rigidity.

Flexible routines give us structure without the stress of perfection.

They allow space for change while still providing a sense of “what happens next.”

Strategies for Building Flexible, Sensory-Friendly Routines

✅ Start Small

Instead of planning an entire day, begin with one anchor point - like a calming morning ritual or a consistent bedtime routine.

Example: “After breakfast, I’ll spend 5 minutes stretching or listening to music.”

✅ Build Around Sensory Needs

Think about what feels soothing or overwhelming.

• If mornings feel chaotic, add a sensory-friendly step like dim lighting or a weighted blanket for comfort.

• If noise is stressful, use noise-cancelling headphones during busy times.

  
  

✅ Use Visual Supports

Visual schedules, timers, or checklists can make routines easier to follow without relying on memory alone.

Example: A simple chart with “Morning Steps” like:

☀️ Brush teeth

☀️ Get dressed

☀️ Listen to a favourite song

✅ Allow Flexibility

Instead of “I must do this at 8:00,” try “I’ll do this after breakfast.”

Linking routines to events rather than exact times makes them easier to manage.

✅ Celebrate Progress

Every small step counts. Routines are tools, not tests. If something doesn’t work, it’s okay to adapt. Your routine should serve you - not the other way around.

Key Takeaways

• Rigid routines can create stress, but flexible routines offer comfort and predictability.

• Sensory-friendly strategies make routines feel safe and supportive.

• Start small, adapt often, and celebrate every win.

  
  

💙 Your routine doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. It just has to work for you.